Time after time

"Lying in my bed, I hear the clock tick and think of you

Caught up in circles
Confusion is nothing new
Flashback, warm nights
Almost left behind
Suitcase of memories
Time after"

These are the opening lyrics of a song by Cindy Lauper.  It is one of my personal Top 40.  It makes me think of time.  Time is so precious.  How quickly it goes.  It is like it disappears.  Do I truly value it?  I ask as I waste so much of it.      

Then during the week, I was introduced to Frida Kahlo, a Mexican artist of last century.  In her 47 years, she obviously suffered much, but achieved much more.  No matter what befell her, she used life to be herself.  She lived life to the full, living it with such passion and creativity.  

Too often, we approach life with disdain, by putting ourselves and our meagre interests at the centre.  So we are prevented from seeing the great treasures of the world and the precious time we have to savour them.  Do we appreciate the mammoth scale of time, within which we enjoy but a nano second?  

It strikes me that we can approach time in two ways.  We can look back and think - Wow!  We live in 2026, so far down the line in history.  Or we can look ahead and think - How much more of history is to come?   Can I fathom it?  

The former serves to make us feel self-assured, superior, being overcome by all that is.  The latter opens our eyes in awe and wonder, enlivening us for so much more to come.  The former enslaves us, getting us stuck in a rut.  The latter liberates us, freeing us for new ways.  Time after time after time ............     

From hope to action

"From hope to action"  is the theme for Laudato Si Week, 2026.  The gauntlet is thrown down for us to move from any sense of passive hope to constructive and positive action.  Christian hope is never passive.  It is lived and shared through daily decisions, community life, prayer and concrete acts of care.  This theme reminds us that ecological conversion grows step by step, through restored relationships, protected creation, and strengthened communities.  The next chapter of Laudato Si' begins with us, wherever we are.  Such goes the theory for Laudato Si Week.  Now for the practice.  

Hope cannot be reduced to human optimism.  We are not called to be optimists but to be people of hope.  We may look at our world and wonder - where is hope?  A life of experience may leave us bitter, slowly killing hope.  I recently read a Caritas International report on the plight of children in Gaza.  It described such shocking conditions that I could barely read it.  I am listening to a friend talk about developments in his life and I could not help thinking that he was heading for personal disaster, but it is his life and I must respect that.  

Hearing my friend, I engaged in sharing on the hard luck stories of my life in the hope of helping him.  It backfired as he reflected that I sounded bitter.  Bitter?  No.  Rather I feel strongly about my life and what has happened along the way.  This "enrages" me to see that life only be better lived.  It is about passion for life.  As I recount my story with my friend, I remember that religion is never about fantasy or escape, but reality and facing it.      

Humility is key

In the 1960s, there was a catchy song with the lead line - "What the world needs now is love, sweet love".  May I be bold enough to suggest that the apt song for today would be - "What the world needs now is humility, tough humility".  I say this as our present world is full of strong egos who think they own the world.  They just go around, doing what they want, where they want, when they want, not caring about anyone else.    

This makes for an absurd world, one which is becoming more and more precarious.  What to do?  

I see a way coming from my brother in Augustine, Pope Leo.  On Holy Thursday last, when reflecting on Jesus' washing the feet of his disciples, he told us: 

"Indeed, through this act, Jesus purifies not only our image of God but also our image of humanity, for we tend to consider ourselves powerful when we dominate, victorious when we destroy our equals, great when we are feared.  In contrast, as true God and true man, Christ offers us the example of self-giving, service and love."  

As I reflect upon this, two questions come to me.   

1)  Who is at the centre of the universe?  

Not me, that is for sure.  As human beings, we are other centred.  As we go into our centre, we find God right there.  Our God is the humble God who is right there, showing us the way of love, a way of sacrifice.  

2)  What are we called to do?  

Simply to love as God loves us, to be humble as God is humble.  Following such a way, we will become more human and our world less absurd.  

Think about it.  I surely do as this is revolutionary stuff.  Our power is in our being humble, as humble as the humble God who washes our feet.  

Do we know the way?

Today, I get in a taxi to come to work.  I tell the driver where I want to go and he gives a confident assurance that he knows exactly where it is.  Well, we only go some 100 metres for me to realise that this guy has no idea.  From there, I had to counsel him and direct him all the way.  This is not the first such occasion where the driver assures me he knows exactly where to go, while he just has no idea at all.  

We can so easily fool ourselves with a false sense of self-assurance, for the sake of looking good or getting the job done.  I am often struck by how we can happily be self-contained within our foolish, comfort bubbles, built upon foundations of fear, isolation and arrogance.  

In my apartment building, I have a neighbour who consistently seems to hide from me.  Whenever our paths may cross, he so obviously avoids me.  His behaviour intrigues me.  I recently, simply cried out to him, as he raced to his door - "Hi!"  His response was to quickly retreat from me. What is this all about?  

Such daily occurrences make me reflect on how disconnected we can be.  In such a 'bubbled world', how do we hope to build up relationships, let alone become acquainted and comfortable with the deeper realities of life that make us fully human?  How will we ever get in touch with our true, shared humanity?  Or do we just wish to maintain our individual, power stance, protecting our self-interests? 

Life is about so much more.  Don't we realise that the sacred is at the core of who we are?  We are worth so much.  Our relationships could run deep, offering satisfaction to our human search for true and fulfilling life.  In puirsuit of this quest, our creator puts us in touch with the transcendent.  As Erik Varden expresses it, "Faith enables us to interpret known experience in a supernatural light, making us at once more realisitic and more enlightened, in other words, more human".    

God shows us the way.  We just exit our bubble, letting go of our need to please and control. Unburden ourselves from what burdens us and be free to venture being fully human.  The way can be frightening.    

People do care

Stop explaining yourself to people who didn't want to understand you from the start.  (Koendanai)

Ronan Keating's song ever stands as a classic wedding song with the words - "you say it best when you say nothing at all".  Actions not words matter.  This is a good life philosophy.  

This past week, I came upon an article from Australia by a woman, in her 60s, who had been adopted.  Given my own life story around adoption, it grabbed my attention.  As I read it, I found that, even with a shared story of origin, her story was not mine and I just thought to myself, "What is her issue?".  Even on admitting that she was adopted into a good family, she was still demanding a public apology for being adopted without her consent.  Why?  Can't she just live with gratitude for the good life she enjoyed and get on with life, beyond all the trials she suffered along the way?   After all, the bottom line is that, to this day, people do care for her.  

I then read her write that any narrative of adoption may revolve around sympathy, or at least for some.  "No way!", I react to myself.  My response is: "Act on your life.  Do some good with what you have been given."  Then, at the end of the article, there is a plea from the editorial staff in Melbourne - "Support respectful conversations in a time of division".  Now, doesn't that say something!  

My considered reflection is to ask myself - "Who is apologizing for the genocide in Gaza or the evil of war in Sudan?".   I further ask myself - "Do some people expect far too much out of life?  Do people not recognize that life is primarily about giving, not just receiving?  Do they not recognize the care that they are already receiving and be thankful for that?".   

We may not see all that is good in our lives.  We may become too comfortable and nonchalant.  Despite all that we may or may not see and experience around us, there are people who do care for us.  

One great giver of care was Pope Francis, who died a year ago.  He shared with us a primary rule for life - the via caritas, the way of love.  His way challenges us to be ever kind and ever merciful, seeing beyond people's fragility, self-centredness and even lack of love or cruelty.  In this way, we uphold the dignity of life and live the vision of God.  Thank you my friend and good shepherd for you do care.     

Rules are made to be broken

"Rules are made to be broken".  That sounds somewhat radical or rebllious.  It speaks of me but, as I hear it, I wonder what happened to John, the rebel.  Hss he been lost?  Whatever happened to my favourite James Dean poster - "Rebel without a cause"?  I took it with me wherever I went, when I lived in Australia.  It both spoke to me and of me.  "Ever the rebel!" would be my cry.  I think it is time to regain my past. 

Why does this theme arise in my life just now?  Once I was told by a wise person not to think too much, but I keep thinking, trying to understand life.  That is who I am.  Am I simply too introspective?  Am I just a comfortable yet challenging thinker?  Karl Marx's dictum was that the task of philosophers was to change the world.  So hopefully I reflect on life and the questions arise. 

Life goes on and on, going where?  My life has a routine, getting the same results time and again.  So I think, is it not time to change something, especially if it is not working?  

I want to achieve so much.  So why don't I just go out and do it, before it is too late?  What holds me back?  

I guess it all boils down to asking if there isn't more to life than my everyday and where I find myself in it.     

I identify that I live life within somewhat stritly defined circles.  This is not me.  I don't know if that is anyone in the world, as control does not work.  Life needs boundaries but not endless rules and demands placed by outside forces.  

Rules have a purpose, they deserve to be respected, but they don't always work and they aren't meant to squash the human spirit.  Flexibbility is also good, allowing rules to be broken at good times and for good reasons.  For what purpose do we confine ourselves within tight circles, when we know there is so much more to life, so much more to give, but all we do is ever passively suffer the absurdities of life?  Why?  Thus have we made the world.  So let us change it.  

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The Lord may be risen, but I am tired

As it is Easter, I might be expected to be enlivened, energetic and positive in life.  Truth is I just feel tired.  I am neither pessimistic nor dispirited.  I am simply tired from ever trying to help people, getting nowhere.  I feel this after my latest attempt to help another western national in Bangkok.  In the end, nothing changes, but you can't see the person penniless, when alone and lost in a foreign environment.  

Still, this is where they chose to be, despite their issues and brokenness, which weigh heavily on them.  My friend of the last few days does not stand alone.  There surely are a number of westerners who are lost souls, choosing to live isolated in Bangkok.  They eventually get into trouble - money, health, misfortune -  and need a Fr John, going nowhere, except their harsh or fantastical Bangkok.  I often wonder what it is about this place.  

Their plight is endless, going nowhere.  They know where they want to be.  Whatever their reality may be, they want to be in Bangkok.  So helping is tiring as what do I achieve?  Help and their plight just goes on and on and on.  This same narrative is repeated time and again, helping any broken people, thus helping can be a thankless and tiring task.  So what to do?  The response is in the season.  I am asking the wrong question, for it is not about what I achieve.  It is about much more than my little world.  

Our world is transformed by the resurrection of Jesus.  Do I get that?  That new heaven and the new earth have exploded into our world.  Do I get that?  In approaching the mundane, the routine, the daily slog, I too easily lose sight of the transcendental.  Life is determined by much more than my concerns, achievements, successes, failures and feelings.  It is energizing to remember that I am part of a project so much bigger and much more important.  The project for life!  So keep going, don't tire.  .  

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