The lessons of a workshop or two

I have spent three days this week at workshops.  One was on human rights and development, while the other was on migrants in ASEAN.  A common theme in both is how the theory and the ideal do not match up with the reality.  There is a real disconnect.  Yes, we hold to human rights but ...  Yes, there are policies and principles to follow but ....  I guess that is nothing specific to Southeast Asia.  It just speaks of humanity. 

My other highlight of the week has been my annual medical check-up for renewing my work permit.  It is a Thai government requirement and so you do it but it is the biggest waste of money and time.  You are tested for tertiary syphillis and passed as not having"leprosy, elephantitis, mental retardation, alcoholism or drug addiction".  When the doctor sees you, not a word is spoken.  She just does the blood pressure and the stethoscope thing.  The only sense I make of it is that it is a local money spinner and a bureaucratic requirement that helps keep you in your place.  If one did not approach it with a sense of humour, one could get quite phased by it all as it is rather prejudicial against one's standing as a decent human being.  Yes, I had a medical check-up but ... 

I guess this is one theme of life generally.  We have systems to make the workplace efficient and effective and present it as such  but ....  Our family, our community is happy and looks after each other but ... We have principles in our life but ...  I live in a culture which has a strong focus on presenting well but I experience and know the reality.  It does fall short of the 'picture perfect' image it wants to present.  We so often fall short.  Still this is no excuse for bad behaviour, unjust systems, ineffective practices, needless suffering.  They may continue but we keep striving and doing our bit, working to make that ideal we vision and so eagerly want to present our reality. 

A Buddhist Holy Day and Holiday

This has been a long weekend as Friday was Visakha Bucha Day in the Buddhist calendar.  It is the most important of Buddhist holy days as it marks the day that Buddha was born, the day of his enlightenment 35 years later and finally his death 45 years after that.  So what happens on such a day here?

Well, it is a public holiday.  The day seems quiet, with little traffic and many Thais leaving Bangkok.  Despite all, shopping continues.  So in many ways it is similar to back home.  It might be a religious holy day but life goes on while everyone enjoys a holiday.  Still what is it that makes it different?   

On such a day, Thais go to the temple and make merit.  Making merit is about giving to the monks so as to gain in one's karma.  The monk becomes one's avenue to salvation or a better next life.  So Thais look after their monks and respect them as they are the holy ones, identified as following Buddha most closely and being channels of  the sacred. 

This is the same sort of approach followed by Thai Catholics in approaching their priests.  They have this great respect for their identified holy men who, for them, show the way to salvation and maybe are the way.  There is a saying that goes something like this - salvation is found through holding onto the robes of the monk.  This says that salvation does not come directly but through an intermediary, the monk who is the public holy one. 

This has real repercussions.  I am doing my grocery shopping after Sunday mass today and meet a Thai woman from church.  When I go to pay for my groceries, she comes from nowhere and pays the cashier for me.  She just says - remember me at mass.  This was a first for me.  I felt uncomfortable but saw what she was doing in light of their culture and beliefs and needed to respect this.  I also thought what a lovely gesture for which I am grateful and accept gratefully. 

Bangkok  might be highly developed but there is much more to here than modern buildings and up to date infrastructure.  It is still Thailand and all that goes with that.  Any number of new buildings can't ultimately hide or take that away.  Thank goodness!    

The Personal and the Social - it's all connected

It is time to move beyond the more personal issues and themes of friends and how we relate to the wider issues facing our world.  I say this and I see already the hole in what I am saying.  Everything is related.  How we relate at the personal level with friends and others is reflected in how we relate with the wider world and the people we don't know and the issues facing it. 

Funny that as I name the wider issues, I start to talk more impersonally.  Why?  For all issues and relationships whether on the one to one level or at the big picture level are personal for they affect and engage real people. 

I found this map giving the global overview of people displaced worldwide due to disasters during 2012.  There was a total of 32.4 million people displaced.  This was almost double the number displaced by disaster in 2011.  This is a great tragedy and yet while we are talking about natural disaster, so much of it is man made.  Why?

These disasters are 98% weather related, being impacted by the effects of climate change.  Those so often affected are the same ones - the poor in whatever country.  Poorer countries with little infrastructure are mostly affected, having less resources available to help those affected.  Then there are those many displaced by conflict - definitely man made. 

On the same Facebook page for Pax Romana, I also discovered a news article on Pope Francis who was speaking on the role of clergy in the Church.  He said:
"We learn poverty from the humble, the poor, the sick.  ...  We have no use for theoretical poverty." 

I see the connection between my two finds for the week.  On one side, needs at all levels and of all kinds are real in our world.  On the other side, the challenge is how we meet them. 

Yes, we face so many challenges when we start to face the issues and needs of our world at both the personal and social levels.  No one need is to be discounted and all are connected in some way through our human fragility and vulnerability. 

I feel the burden in trying to reach out to urban refugees in Bangkok.  Their needs are too much for me to meet and too much for all of us combined who reach out to them in Bangkok.   So my driving philosophy (or surviving philosophy) has become:
"We just do what can do.  It is not our responsibility to solve everybody's problems as we can't and it is not our role.  We are here to help. We are not the only builders of the Kingdom.  We do what we can and we rejoice in what we can do."

I voiced this to Bro Khushi, a Franciscan Brother here from Pakistan, on his bemoaning receiving yet another negative response in seeking help for these desperate people.  I spoke it so immediately and so passionately with him that it tells me that here is a truth for me in my lived reality that is worth sharing. 

Am I becoming too eastern?

Well, Stella, my friend is back home in Australia.  She did get her clothes as she wished.  Then, on Friday, she told me during a phone conversation that the cost of the clothes was far too high and on that basis wouldn't recommend the chosen tailor again.  As I heard her talk, I just kept quiet and took in what was being said. 

Looking back, I could see a basic difference between our two approaches.  Stella focused on the financial side, becoming critical of the tailor.  I focused on the relationship side, not saying anything of much worth and only reflecting to myself how the tailor was so good to her.  Interestingly, both approaches would lead to the same outcome, being that if the tailor was too expensive, then you would try somewhere else.  The difference is in the approach.  Maybe this speaks more of who we are as individuals but it does draw my attention as I wonder if my time here is changing me in how I approach issues. 

In looking at this, I would not say that one approach is better than the other but that each is different and each has its strengths.  No one person or culture has all wisdom.  There is strength in each.  There is time for action, there is time for reflection, but act wisely and with compassion at all times. 

Maybe I can illustrate this by another story of last week.  My manager at the Bangkok Refugee Center, when discussing issues of change with me last week, finished our discussion with this line - Buddha says that change is constant.  To which I replied that we hold to that same truism back home.  She shared this with the underlining Buddhist approach of just passively accepting change.  I retorted that you can just react to change and have change happen to you or you can plan for it and act on it.  The western Christian way is to be pro-active and actively wortk for change for the better.  Interestingly again, Buddha also stresses the value of compassion. 

Once again, we see two different approaches at play.  This time I hold to my western, Christian way as I see the great value in following it.  The gospels call us to be builders of the Kingdom.  How can we be that if we just sit back and wait for whatever change may occur? 

Maybe I am not becoming eastern.  Maybe being here makes me more reflective and more willing to stand back before acting.  I say this because in both cases what drives me is compassion.  With Stella's fair issue, it is compassion for the tailor whom I saw as doing her best, even if she did overcharge.  With the manager's observation from Buddha's teaching on change, it is compassion for the refugees being adversely affected by planned changes.  In both cases, I feel for these people and judge that the way to go is to be pro-active but in a compassionate way for a better outcome.   

Good friends make life

 

Well, Stella's visit to Bangkok has come and gone.  It was  five full days.  We had a shopping mall day.  We had a temple day.  Then there was the heat, the food and the traffic.  It was good fun.  At the end of it all, Om and I put her on the plane and now Bangkok is recovering but worth every minute. 

Om, another good friend, became very much a part of Stella's visit.  As the local, he wanted to join in and help out so that a vistor to his country and one of my friends could have a good time.  He led the shopping venture for a new computer for Stella.  He was our guide when we went to Wat Pho and Wat Arun, two main temples in Bangkok.  He cooked dinner one night and it was delicious.  He even drove Stella to the airport.  He enjoyed her time as well. 

So Stella's visit was a group effort and made more enjoyable and more successful through sharing it with others.  Om was a significant contributor but there were others along the way who also made the experience - Michael at church, Freddy and the Cream, Nando and his spaghetti, Vee and her friendly service in making the outfits.  They all made Stella's visit what it was - enjoyable and memorable.  Oh, I forgot, Om was also the official photographer and surpassed in this endeavour as well. 

Maybe they don't even realise it as they are just being themselves and doing nothing out of the ordinary, other than being helpful, friendly and hospitable selves.  Still it is true.  Life is made special and so much more worthwhile by friends.  Thank God for good friends.