I don't have to be always nice

 

One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making 

the darkness conscious.   (Carl Jung)   

I follow online a smart, young Thai who, among other roles, is a therapist, who hosts a regular Podcast, discussing life issues.  One of his lines from this forum stays with me.  It was expressed in colloquial American terms that I cannot repeat here, but he basically shared that we can feel free not to be nice all the time. Why should we?  Who said to be nice?  We are challenged to be good, not nice.  

I suffer a bad right knee, for which I am about to go into hospital for an operation.  A good coping  mechanism and constant companion over the last two months has been my walking stick, which unwittingly has become a magnet for much kindness.  

My present stick replaces my original one that broke while I was in Vietnam.  The very day it broke, our pilgrimage group was visiting Phat Diem cathedral and diocesan centre.  My first reaction was to feel panicky, wondering what to do, when away from home.  I then purposely stood my ground, took a deep breath and assured myself that God would look after me, as he had all along on this journey with my knee.  That is another story.   

Once again , God did look after me, in the person of a priest who ran the diocesan pilgrim centre.  He heard of my plight from our tour guide and, without question, gave me one of their pilgrim walking sticks, hand carved no less.   He was so happy to help me, insisting that this was pure gift, saying that they can easily make more sticks.  I was so touched by his kindness towards me, someone he had never before met.  

One of our group on the pilgrimage befriended me and kept an eye on me.  She was consistently so kind.   Over my time with my stick, I have had great experiences of kindness from complete strangers - motorbike taxi drivers, helping me on and off their motorbike; Thai Immigration officers taking pity on me and leading me to the head of the queque; fellow tourists helping me on and off a small boat in the Mekong Delta.  The list is endless.  So much kindness, all because I carry my stick.  

That stick made my vulnerability public.  I was reluctant to take it up.  By doing so, I was putting myself at risk, but the exact opposite happened.  Sharing my vulnerability brought out the best in others and I was the happy receiver of their kindness. So, see!  No one has to be perfect.  No has to be nice all the time.  Rather, we are called to be good    

    

Recognize our true leaders

It stays with me that I was recently wandering around Vietnam, with my eyes wide open, being ever in awe, as I met so many kind, admirable, capable souls, who showed so much awareness of the amazing possibilities of life, despite any adversity.  In My Bangkok, I was reminded of this as I encountered one of our own here, making his First Communion at Sunday mass.  

I approached that simple, Sunday event with no great expectation, just a sense of how best to include this young lad on his big day.  Looking back, I saw how he bravely came forward and naturally turned it all around, by showing us how to lead on his big day.  He did so by spontaneously being his confident and friendly self, just like I experienced so often, with so many young people, whom I met on my travels, through Vietnam.  

For me, over the past month, it has been a privilege and an opportunity to meet true world leaders who pop up in my everyday life, in the midst of the unexpected or unplanned.  They are just there living their lives, doing what they need to do along the way, but they are there leading, and I am so thrilled to meet them and have them lead me along the way.