A first in 12 years

This week, I had a first in my 12 years here in Thailand.  As usual, I go to the office early morning and on my way, walking quietly along the street, for the first time ever, two people said "Hello!" as they went past.  I was taken aback.  This never happens in

Thailand - strangers being so effusively friendly on the street.  The normal and expected way is that everyone keeps to themselves and if someone says "Hello!" , watch out as they want something.  This time it was nothing like that.  It was simply two by-passers being friendly - and two during the same, short walk, not one.  Amazing! 

Then I read a social commentary article in the local press on the Thai "mistress culture".  I am sure this is not peculiar to Thailand but maybe just more so here and its history is telling.  This social phenomenon is placed within an historical context: 
Rama V abolished slavery in 1897;
the 1908 legal code named rape as a personal offence, thus only requiring personal compensation to the offended party;
monogamy was finally legislated only in 1934. 

This context may explain the social reticence of friendly Thais.  Reality is that until recent times Thais could be used and abused legally by those who were above them or their masters in any way.  In subtle and not so subtle ways, this system continues with men using women, with the elite using their lessers.  Within such a social context, the simple friendly wave or friendly shout in the street is quite uncommon.  Everyone  keeps to themselves, not wanting unwanted attention and warding off any unwanted approaches.  So it is a welcome surprise when a stranger naturally extends a simple, friendly greeting on the street.   

I know a saint! Amazing!

Fr Mychal Judge ofm - to be declared a saint?

Well, lo and behold, I look at Facebook this week and see that I know a man being put before the Church for canonization.  It makes me think - Am I alive that long?  Am I that well connected in this Church?

Who is he?  Mychal Judge, a Franciscan priest of New York.  I met Mychal when I had a month staying with the Franciscan community in Lower Manhattan back in 1999.  The connection was that my then Provincial, Pat Fahey, had a cousin in the community, Chris Keenan ofm.  Pat judged that it would be good for me to spend time with Chris and his community so as to get to know their varied and creative ministries which included a Franciscan brother making leather goods to raise money for Franciscan Ministries and the poor.  Creative indeed!

A must for my time there was for me to spend time with this Mychal Judge, or so advised Chris. So I did meet Mychal in his room and talked with him.  He was a chaplain to the New York Fire Department.  He talked about his work and how much he loved it.  He obviously did a lot for the men and the families of the Fire Department for whom he had a deep love and true passion.  A great man!

Then on 9/11, I saw on the news that a Catholic priest was killed at the World Trade Centre and I couldn't believe it - it was this Mychal.  I had met him and spent time with him.  He became a recognized hero who was now going to be put forward for canonization.  

I met him briefly.  He was a good man.  I do not doubt that.  I could glorify him and my meeting with him but the truth is that I hardly knew the man.  He was one of over 50 good men, Franciscans living in community, in 32nd St Manhattan. The one I did get to know was my host - Chris.  He was good to me, spent time with me, saw to my needs. He was simply a kind and dedicated man.  No one extraordinary, just someone who lives life with integrity and authenticity.  He still lives.

Now I know him to be a living saint in New York.  In place of Mychal Judge, he did take on the role of Chaplain to the NYFD and he loves it.  I see by this latest photo in the media that he remains faithful to this day to his ministry and to the good men and women he serves.  He too is a saint.  There are so many saints in our midst.  We just don't recognize them or we simply take them for granted.   For all the saints!

Chris Keenan ofm today in New York leading a memorial to Mychal Judge and others of NYFD killed in 9/11

Melas for Childred

I am at a government centre which features a sport centre and pool.  I go over to inspect the pool and what do I see?  A sign advising "Man" and "Men".  The picture of the Men is a young woman in a stylish swimming costume.  Interesting!   Then at work, I sign a cheque to cover "Melas for Childred".  What is going on here? 

Every week, I write here about a theme or happening of the week that attracts my attention.  Sometimes, like this week, I wonder why I made my choice as I did.  Then it just hit me.  This is not about poor use of English used by Thais in a professional setting but rather about how they are treated by their own within their own society and culture.  Language is but a sign of what happens here. namely, the people are kept down by their superiors in their place and that is where they are to stay. 

I have read and I do see how Thais are all educated but only to a certain level so as to keep them in their station in society.  Have them too educated and too many might move above their level in society and thus create problems for the status quo.  An interesting theory but I see it in practice and it works.  My question as a good, western liberal is how long you can keep good people down?

Thai society is based on a strict and highly defined hierarchy.  Every one knows their place and is to keep their place.  "Don't rock the boat!" may be an unspoken national theme.  I see it in my workplace in the Church.  The staff are looked after by their boss or patron (however you want to identify it) but they in return are ruled by him. There is a price. I hear how staff are treated by their patron, in this case the bishop.  The model is one of "Follow me or else!"  It is not my model and it would not work at home.

As I try to deal with work matters with staff, this is the ultimate wall I hit time and again as I did again this week  Me being me can easily feed into this agenda as it is about righting a wrong and justice for the oppressed but you know what?  I have to act wisely and I have to remind myself yet again that this is not a just world in its everyday realities and I can't make it that way by being the lone warrior.  It just doesn't work.   

I recognize that this is not my fight and for good reason.  Bottom line is I have no right to change anyone and definitely no right to change a whole culture, even when I may judge it needs changing.  It just is not my place to engage in such a struggle.  After all, I am an outsider here and it is not my place to change anyone except myself.  What then is my place?

My place is to accompany, to speak honestly with ones in my life when they are treated abysmally and to encourage and empower them to act for themselves.  Ultimately, it is their struggle but not alone.  No one can fight their fight for them.  Nor is it anyone else's place to do so.  This is about respect and respecting each person's right and ability to raise themselves up but in a context where we act for and with each other. To put it another way, we see God in being with each other in our need, in getting our hands dirty with those in trouble.  We do not see God in controlling, directing or ruling others, even when they are down or in need and even when doing so for good purpose.

So I will keep reading these signs - Man and Men.  But where are the Women?

For Flock's Sake

"For flock's sake".  So is the 2010 Guardian article entitled that reports on the Vatican dictum that homilies should be kept to eight minutes.  I respect this ruling, or try to, in a country where many clergy exhibit the need to preach regularly for much longer.  As I try to understand why, I hear the line that it is so important to say everything on the matter at hand and not forget anything.  This is our obligation to the people.  Is it? What is this about?  Once again, control?  Or is it a sense of over importance concerning one's role and contribution in the world.

I am sure the faithful know what they need to do and know right from wrong.  It just is that their world is so tumultuous, so frightening at times.  Daily, they face dilemmas, crises big or small and questions demanding attention.  Life is not necessarily dealt with that easily by words given from on high.

There are the losses, the stresses, the anxieties, the doubts, the suffering that we all face in life.  They  arise in the throes of everyday life.  We do not wish or want them but they still come our way and we have to deal with them, whether we like it or not.  They just are part of the package that is life.

Life is not black and white.  It does not fit into easy and understandable categories.  It cannot be boxed in by our own designs and comforts.  All that life throws at us cannot be met with by planned responses or controlled strategies or even 20 minute homilies.  Rather the rough and tumble of life is faced by people's creativity, compassion, courage, initiative and just sheer will and determination.  People live their faith in the everyday unknown and not in the realm of an ecclesial fairy-tale.

I think of the good, simple Filipino woman who presented her third child for baptism last Sunday.  There she was with her husband and children and five of the eight godparents.  They were not hi-so with loads of cash and oozing fashion.  They were just good, down to earth, everyday people struggling to do the right thing and do it well.  When I joked about returning when they have Number 4, she just innocently looked at me, smiled and nodded gently a gentle No.  I love her.  My hat goes off to her.

The faithful are so wise in our world and so adept at dealing with their lot.  So much so that I am in awe of their wisdom.  For flock's sake, they do need the eight minute homily, but to affirm them of their goodness and to assure them that the humble God is with us in the struggle of the everyday.