Hope is never ending

Two outstanding participants among the young Burmese

It is Christmas and end of the year all in one.  Despite whatever may be going in my life and world, I always feel a sense of overwhelming joy and excitement at this time of the year.  For me, it is the nature of the season.  I am aware of the difficulties and challenges around me but they never drown out the surpassing joy and excitement.  Then I found this past week support for my maybe innocent or misguided stance in life from most surprising sources.

One was in visiting a gathering of young Burmese migrant workers here in Bangkok.  They were gathered for a day of celebration to mark the end of the year.  During the year, they enjoy the Caritas outreach which brings them together for opportunities in education and vocational training.  These young adults know more difficulty and challenge than most at their age but being with them all I could feel was their sense of vigor, zest for life and joyful hope.   Being with them nourished and refreshed me.  They were life giving.

The other source was much more distant but just as real.  It came to me through a powerful song sung by children suffering in war torn Syria, named "Heartbeat" and produced by UNICEF.  In the midst of death and destruction, their voice for life and hope spoke loud and clear.  In the midst of devastation, they sung with joy, affirming that "dreams we built together will all come true".

From brokenness and vulnerability comes the strongest and most gut wrenching message for hope and life in our world.  Christmas is truly a time for joy and excitement.  Let it not be killed by any force.  Just let it live on. 

Happy Christmas!

I don't understand

A Christmas scene in Bangkok

So close to Christmas and a bottom line in my Thailand remains stuck at "I don't understand".  This was the bottom line of a robust discussion in my office where one Thai staff member got angry with me over 'I am not sure exactly why'.  I ask myself - what is it that I am not getting here? 

The scene was that I was acting to help staff deal with a situation in the office.  Obviously my presentation of my defence got her angry.  I won't go into the issue but just say that as I spoke, I became aware that I did not know all the facts but only the facts made available to me.  Whatever the case, all I was doing was trying to be helpful and explain matters when I was confronted by her anger, with the bottom line given to me -  "I just do not understand you".  I could honestly reply that I do not understand either.  Why all this anger?  I was not angry. 

Then all this anger was lumped onto me and I found myself reacting inside with anger as why should I be getting this blast?  I did my best to stand back and not get angry as vented anger goes nowhere and becomes counterproductive, expecially here where no one deals with confrontation.  Yet, as I said at the time, it is good to get angry.  I believe this even though anger is never easy.

And you know?  Anger can produce positive results as it did in this case.  The outcome was that there is spoken agreement that we don't understand each other and that we need to talk more.  Maybe Christmas is the right time to have such a discussion as it leads to needed growth which never comes easily.  It involves hard work and comes at a cost.  There is no magical way.   

Yes, I might want Christmas all year round but it has to be about much more than sweet sounding melodies and everyone being happy and nice.  It does not happen by magic.  It takes hard and uncomfortable work which will be done in the hope of creating of creating greater understanding.  This speaks of a world that is more Christmassy, a world where people can somehow operate together, care for each other more and show each other a smile instead of a frown.   Christmas is not about the simplistic and unreal approach of never crying and never pouting.   So let Christmas roll on!

We never stop learning

Advent Wreath

Well, it is that time of year, the lead up to Christmas, which, for the Church, is the season of Advent, a season of waiting or more poignantly of eager expectation.  The great symbol of Advent is the Advent wreath which has four candles, one for each of the four Sundays of Advent.  So as you go through the Sundays, you light the next candle until only the Christ candle in the centre is left for Christmas Day.  Marvellous!

Then today at mass, I learn from the Monsignor that the symbolism gets even better as the four candles symbolise in turn hope, peace. joy, love.  I never knew that.  How true that you never stop learning.  For some reason, learning this simple insight just blew me away.  Why?

Maybe, it is the world we live in as we so need each of those four values to be alive and flourishing in our midst. 

Yes, I love Christmas.  It has never been just for gifts and shopping but for the spirit, the symbols, the colour, the beauty, the catchy melodies, the joy.  All this I experience at this time of the year.  It is like I can never get enough of it.  Then I ask why can't it be like this all year?  Well, for one thing, the tree and the decorations and the silly music are not there all the time to make us feel good as it all just does not fit for a year round event.  Still maybe we could make them be there all year round so that life feels good the whole year.  That is one way to go. 

There again, that is not being realistic.  It has to be more than feel good.  We have to do good and make good.  Life, like all of us, is a mixed bag but let us all remember where we want to be - on the side of hope, peace, joy and love.   We can never get enough of Christmas and we need it right now. 

What does it mean to be a Thai?

Maria, Miss Thailand Universe 2017

Thailand stood still on Monday as it watched with eager anticipation the finals of Miss Universe 2017 as their woman was among the final five.  All the interest so amused me as back home such a contest in my circle is looked down upon as being sexist and demeaning of women.  You can disagree.  Thailand as one was simply bereft when their woman did not make the top three, being chucked out because of her inability to deal with the social question. 

What was the question?  It was to name a siginificant socialm movement in our world.  She answered "youth", showing that she did not understand the question.  This has led to some serious relfection in the country by some Thais on what is it with Thailand?  It has been named in the Bangkok Post that, in a country where any social movement is disallowed or controlled by a military government, Thais lack experience of social movements.  So how can this poor woman make a response on something she never experiences?  Think on that one for a bit while I porceed to Part 2 of my refelction.

There is a Thai monsignor here who has spent 27 years working with the Vatican.  He returns a sophisticated, learned man of the world.  He befriended me and I like him a lot.  At Caritas, I talk with the right person about a work issue that concerns the Monsignor, whose role includes leadership for Caritas.  This other Thai guy is also smart and has studied outside Thailand.   I can see the Monsignor does not comprehend all about what we do at Caritas but my colleague names this lacking in another way.  He says that Monsignor has lived so long out of Thailand and in so many places that he is no longer Thai. 

Think about that one for a bit. 

Such a line raises many questions for me about here.  It highlights how xenophobic Thais can be, having a narrow sense of the world and of their place in it.  They are very particular about who they allow into their circle, while being friendly to all, or at least cautiously so. 

It raises for me a question - What does it mean to be a Thai?  You are no longer a true Thai because you have lived out of the place for so long and changed such that you no longer fit into the Thai social norm of what it means to be a Thai.  Interesting!  How do you define citizenship?  I could give my description of what this social norm entails but then who defines it more importantly.  The elite?  Those in power?  The people do accept it that is for sure.  Then if you are no longer seen as Thai, how are you treated amongst your own?  Ostracized?  Looked down upon?  With charity and care, needing re-education?

This line raises so many questions for me and not just about here.  It raises questions about me who has lived outside my country for 12 years.  I am no longer Australian?  I do not think so.  I hope not.  Will I ever belong in such a Thailand?  I doubt it and that is okay.  I just accept it for what it is.  Through learning and wider life experiences, don't you become an even better citizen of your country and of the world?  I believe so. 

Amazing Thailand.  You never cease to amaze me.  You keep me young.  Thanks so much.   Meanwhile poor Maria was teary as she faced the Thai community and simply admitted she did her best.   What more can any of us do? 

It's hard to keep a secret these days

Yes, it was my birthday this week.  I keep it to myself as I am low key on such matters but then I am feted at the office of Caritas Thailand by the staff, offering a gift and singing "Happy Birthday".  I asked how they knew and am told Facebook.  So you just can't keep a secret these days. 

Birthday at the top of Bangkok with friends.

What puzzles me is the power of social media as it is a mixed bag.  It is a social reality but what is its impact?  The question arose for me this week after my Irish neighbour shared about a possible return to the polls in Ireland due to the power of the social media in revealing publicly a lacking by their Deputy PM.  Is it that powerful?  Yes, it is but my question then becomes how the users of social media choose their issues and how factual is what they share.  I am not going to go on a 'fake news' tirade but these are serious qustions for me. 

I was recently sent a great piece by Pope Francis that was posted by a Catholic parish in the USA.  I was so impressed that I wanted to share it myself but some little part of the piece did not speak of Pope Francis.  So I did a Google check and discovered that this is a popular piece but it is not from Pope Francis himself, only being attrubuted to him.  This meant that I did not share the piece. 

While the Irish Deputy PM fell, do proceed with caution.  Same as the papers - don't believe everything you read. 

I want to get off this merry-go-round

Well, as you can see by the picture, it is getting to that time of year again already.  I can't believe it.  As we approach the end of another year, I feel overcome with tasks and demands.  It all makes me reflect on life and what really matters.  What is it all about?  Surley, it cannot be reduced to meetings, reports and all sorts of other work matters.  Life has to have so much more to offer, and it does.  We just need to get off the merry-go-round more and take a good look at daily life.  This is just so important for appreciating who we are as people, human individuals.  

The key to life is that we simply bring our humanity to the table and be human.  We don't have to bring all the other baggage or excess that we carry around. 

I wondered where I was going with this and then it hit me.  Today is American Thanksgiving.  Don't worry.  I am not changing my citizenship but I live in Bangkok which is an international hub.  So today I celebrate mass for Thanksgiving with the Maryknoll team here from the US Church.  I am then going out to Thanksgivng dinner at a Thai pub in the evening for the sake of a friend.  All this in Thai Bangkok. 

This is very much Thailand but my Bangkok is an absolute mix of characters, peoples and opportunities.  Today is a time to give thanks for my Bangkok and all it offers me - both good and not so good; both exciting and funny; both challenging and bizarre. 

I am reminded of all this as I go back in time here and return to the Maryknoll office in Bangkok after at least seven years away following my withdrawal from their team when it was time for me to move on, and I did.  The Maryknoll team had been my entry for here, had sustained and nourished me here for five years, but it was all that I describe of my Bangkok - an absolute character but this time an entity.  To go back there today - which is only one songtaew ride away - is a journey back in time for me; a journey that will lead me to reflect on life here and to give thanks. 

I may not be going away on retreat or holiday but today I am getting off my merry-go-round in very real ways in the midst of my Bangkok, and I am sure it will all give me the booster I need, reminding me of who I am and not of all the things I have to do. 

When is a Question

Putting up the tree.

When is one of the basic questions in life. 

It arose for me this week when Om was showing off his new Christmas tree.  He may be Buddhist; he may be Thai; he may not understand but like so many from outside a Christian culture or upbringing, he is drawn by Christmas and its trimmings.  Maybe it is just the trimmings but I suspect it is much more.  Many people, no matter their background, love or have a fascination with Christmas. 

Om was so excited with his new acquisition that all he wanted to do was put up his new tree.  I did not want to dampen spirits or be an autocrat but I am somewhat a purist when it comes to Christmas and so I put forward the opinion that it was too early.  In the spirit of democracy, I decided to raise the question of when within a simple poll on my Facebook page. 

The responses rolled in: 
1st December;
after Thanksgiving;
Christmas Eve; 
16th December; 
whenever you like. 
Quite a diverse response from a limited field.  Responses came from people I know who originate from different parts of the world.  Christmas is a religious feast, becoming more and more a commercial opportunity, but it is also a cultural and family celebration. 

What does my simple poll tell me?  There are guiding principles at play.  Christmas is Christmas and the way we celebrate is valued by us all but there is no one defining response on how that is to be held by all.  I apply this to life and more important issues we face.

It is important we have values but no one set of values can be universally applied to all life situations and all peoples at all times on how we live out central life values.  We respect and uphold them, living them within the context within which we live. 

What I also learn is that asking one basic life question has led to other basic life questions - how? what? who?  Life is not black and white but rather grey.  It is not in having the answer but in asking the question that we find our way in life. 

Are we whom we say we are?

This picture shows quite the cake.  It was the wedding cake at a wedding reception I happily attended last Saturday.  Last weekend, I actually went to two weddings.  One I went as the guest and it was some reception as you can tell by the cake.  For the other, I was a priest at the marriage ceremony where I was joined by three other priests, no less.  At this wedding, I could not believe what I was watching.  On walking down the aisle, the bride nearly fell over.  Why? 

It was her dress which was so cumbersome that it disabled her from walking independently.  So to her rescue came two women who held the bottom of her dress at either side as she walked down the rest of the aisle.  I wanted to laugh but couldn't.  I wondered to myself if the woman realised how ridiculous this made her look. In trying to look stylish, fashionable, rich, she achieved the exact opposite.  I ask why do people do this to themselves?  I ask if people at weddings really appreciate what this is all about?  Or is it all show, all bubbly, all sweet and nice?  'Wedding world' does lose the plot. 

In my office at Caritas Thailand, we work for foreigners.  I sometimes, as I did this week, see the ridiculousness of our position as many Thais, even amongst those working for migrant populations, find it hard within themselves to deal with and accept foreigners.  I am not picking on them.  It is just the way it is and it is a reality I have to deal with as a foreigner myself in Thailand. 

When facing the ridiculousness arising in our realities, whether at work or in the street or at church, we can face the dilemma of our lives.  The question we are faced with is this: What is the real meaning of who we are and what we are about?  Then how do we live it? 

We present a public face about who we are and what we choose to do in life, while in our private sphere another set of even opposing factors may come into play.  This may happen unknowingly or be forced upon us as ones enter the pressure cooker that is 'wedding world'.  The dilemmas, the paradoxes, the misunderstandings, even the ridiculous of life arise.  How do we put it together?  How do we be whom we say we are or whom we want to to be or try to be?   Not easy. 

I'm back

A symbol of Lebanon

I have been to Beirut and back.  It was a great  experience.  Yes, Beirut is rather chaotic.  It has its refugees in their camp in the middle of the city somewhere. It has its distinct zones for Muslims and Christians.  There is all that but still, for me, it had a warm, welcoming feel and the people I met in my few days were so hospitable.   I was never kidnapped once. 

I did go for a three day training with Caritas International.  This meant I was well looked after.  The training was worthwhile.  The food was great.  The one complaint was that there was too much of it.  I got to do a little sightseeing trip to the Shrine of St Charbel (Maronite priest and monk) and on the way went through Byblos.  So I did much in my four days.  It was just a good all round experience.

See, nowhere is permanent.  It is good to move out and experience new places and new challenges.  It is all good for life.  Being in transition is not a bad place to be.  This week is back in Bangkok and onto another training, another learning, another challenge.  Life is in transition. The journey continues and I am doing okay.

We are all in transition

Next week is a big week for me as I will be in Beirut for a training with Caritas International.  Imagine, Beirut.  For me, it sounds exotic, seems so far away.  Hints of possible dangers and adventure?  Who knows? 

Next week also sees the cremation of the deceased King of Thailand, King Bhumibol, who died a year ago.  He was the Thais' beloved King, the father of their nation.  In traditional Thai belief, the King has divine status.  Buddhist cosmology features a universe with the existence of heaven and hell.  The universe comprises of the centre, which is Mount Sumeru, surrounded by Mount Sattaboripan, the ocean and four continents where people live.  The highest place is heaven where deities stay.  It is believed the King comes to the earth for the sake of the world's peace.  When he dies, he returns to Mount Sumeru from where he came, the centre of the universe.  This centre of the universe is an abode of gods and spirits.  The King's cremation is fashioned around this belief.

So the King's cremation is quite a journey.  Mine might seem far away to an exotic place that speaks of  possible danger and adventure but it is nowhere near as final or complete. 

Teresa of Avila's last words to her Sisters on her death were - It is time to walk.  She was definitely a woman of action, a woman on the move, doing great things for Church and humanity. 

What is for sure is that we are all in transition.  Nowhere here is permanent.  We are all on the move.   In the words of St Paul, the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now (and continues to do so). 

So see you after Beirut.  I will see what happens. 

My choice, not God's

I saw these powerful pictures in the weekly Catholic paper and had to share them.  They show a Catholic priest who had been freed by ISIL after being held by them for sometime visiting Rome to pay his respects to the Pope and thank the Vatican for their help in his release.  You can see the true respect between these two people brought together by chaos and suffering. 

As I began my week, an older French woman I know here came to me after mass to tell me her husband had died.  She has great respect for me thanks to our first meeting when she shared the pain of her life journey caused by the Thai Catholic Church as a result of her marrying a Thai Buddhist.  The Church, to which she has remained ever faithful, ostracized her because she married a Buddhist.  I was the first priest to tell her how her Church had wronged her.  For her, this was a powerful experience as it seemed to liberate her. 

So nowshe told me of her husband's death and much more.  Despite whatever the Church has inflicted upon her, she has remained faithful both to her Church and her husband.  She obviously has great love for both.  So, as she spoke lovingly of her husband at the time of his death, she described how life has been a great journey for her, a journey of her choosing, not God's. 

The priest through his choice of vocation and mission ended up as a prisoner of ISIL but was obviously never defeated in his love and hope.  It is the same for this woman.  She fell in love and made her choice in life but whatever heartache came her way, even from the Church, she was never defeated in her love and hope. 

We make ourr choices.  I live in a society that beleives in kharma and having your life mapped out for you because of a previous life.  I will not deny their truth as that would be cultural arrogance on my part.  I will just say that God is with us in our choices, no matter where they lead us.  God bless that lovely woman who shared so passionately and openly with me and gave me a great lesson in life in doing so. 

It is called free will

This is one photo of my Monday journey to work when for good reason I took a different route at a different time.  It meant joining in with the daily rush hour.  In Bangkok, I discovered that it not only involved the obvious car tarffic but also the people traffic. 

It caused me to make a social comment on my FB page - How much pressure can people take in urban life before hitting breaking point?  This led to my facing my time old dilemma arising out of my experience of here.  Does here in its culture and social thinking remain particular to itself and remain as is, creating the same unwanted results over and over again?   Or simply, like anywhere else, is it open to change for the better for the mass of people? 

Here has strong cultural forces and social structures for maintaining what is in society, creating a status quo that remains firmly in place.  This status quo favours the few over the many, remaining in place in part because strangely enough the masses agree with what may even discriminate against them.  All quite different here but maybe not so different as do people anywhere question and pay the price for needed and good change?     

As I struggle with this central question, I sit with two answers.  My head tells me - it will stay as it is as this is Thailand and no one acts to change what is.  Then my heart tells me - it has to change as people are people and we are all human beings, striving for the better. 

What I come to realise is that on this question I choose the answer that I need to choose so as to be true to myself.  As a western, Christian thinker and believer, I hold that change will occur even here as we are all human caught up in the ultimate human quest for the better.  To deny this is to deny a central part of what I believe as any people are not simply determined by any one particular culture or social structure.  Culture is a powerful force.  Any culture is powerful in one's life but no one culture, no matter how rich, has all the truth.  Rather cultures speak to each other.  Change does not come easily for anyone but it does come eventually.  A guiding principle I have learnt in dealing with organizations to which I belong is that you either plan change or suffer change. 

Then I took a risk on my pressing question, giving the last word to my daily reading from the meditations of Oscar Romero.  What did I find? 
"Redemption has been carried out on the cross. ... It is not conformity because conformity is not joy.  Conformity is a pessimistic person, a determinisitc person that believes that everything is imposed on him from above and that he cannot take any action.  This is a false concept of the will of God." 

A first in 12 years

This week, I had a first in my 12 years here in Thailand.  As usual, I go to the office early morning and on my way, walking quietly along the street, for the first time ever, two people said "Hello!" as they went past.  I was taken aback.  This never happens in

Thailand - strangers being so effusively friendly on the street.  The normal and expected way is that everyone keeps to themselves and if someone says "Hello!" , watch out as they want something.  This time it was nothing like that.  It was simply two by-passers being friendly - and two during the same, short walk, not one.  Amazing! 

Then I read a social commentary article in the local press on the Thai "mistress culture".  I am sure this is not peculiar to Thailand but maybe just more so here and its history is telling.  This social phenomenon is placed within an historical context: 
Rama V abolished slavery in 1897;
the 1908 legal code named rape as a personal offence, thus only requiring personal compensation to the offended party;
monogamy was finally legislated only in 1934. 

This context may explain the social reticence of friendly Thais.  Reality is that until recent times Thais could be used and abused legally by those who were above them or their masters in any way.  In subtle and not so subtle ways, this system continues with men using women, with the elite using their lessers.  Within such a social context, the simple friendly wave or friendly shout in the street is quite uncommon.  Everyone  keeps to themselves, not wanting unwanted attention and warding off any unwanted approaches.  So it is a welcome surprise when a stranger naturally extends a simple, friendly greeting on the street.   

I know a saint! Amazing!

Fr Mychal Judge ofm - to be declared a saint?

Well, lo and behold, I look at Facebook this week and see that I know a man being put before the Church for canonization.  It makes me think - Am I alive that long?  Am I that well connected in this Church?

Who is he?  Mychal Judge, a Franciscan priest of New York.  I met Mychal when I had a month staying with the Franciscan community in Lower Manhattan back in 1999.  The connection was that my then Provincial, Pat Fahey, had a cousin in the community, Chris Keenan ofm.  Pat judged that it would be good for me to spend time with Chris and his community so as to get to know their varied and creative ministries which included a Franciscan brother making leather goods to raise money for Franciscan Ministries and the poor.  Creative indeed!

A must for my time there was for me to spend time with this Mychal Judge, or so advised Chris. So I did meet Mychal in his room and talked with him.  He was a chaplain to the New York Fire Department.  He talked about his work and how much he loved it.  He obviously did a lot for the men and the families of the Fire Department for whom he had a deep love and true passion.  A great man!

Then on 9/11, I saw on the news that a Catholic priest was killed at the World Trade Centre and I couldn't believe it - it was this Mychal.  I had met him and spent time with him.  He became a recognized hero who was now going to be put forward for canonization.  

I met him briefly.  He was a good man.  I do not doubt that.  I could glorify him and my meeting with him but the truth is that I hardly knew the man.  He was one of over 50 good men, Franciscans living in community, in 32nd St Manhattan. The one I did get to know was my host - Chris.  He was good to me, spent time with me, saw to my needs. He was simply a kind and dedicated man.  No one extraordinary, just someone who lives life with integrity and authenticity.  He still lives.

Now I know him to be a living saint in New York.  In place of Mychal Judge, he did take on the role of Chaplain to the NYFD and he loves it.  I see by this latest photo in the media that he remains faithful to this day to his ministry and to the good men and women he serves.  He too is a saint.  There are so many saints in our midst.  We just don't recognize them or we simply take them for granted.   For all the saints!

Chris Keenan ofm today in New York leading a memorial to Mychal Judge and others of NYFD killed in 9/11

Melas for Childred

I am at a government centre which features a sport centre and pool.  I go over to inspect the pool and what do I see?  A sign advising "Man" and "Men".  The picture of the Men is a young woman in a stylish swimming costume.  Interesting!   Then at work, I sign a cheque to cover "Melas for Childred".  What is going on here? 

Every week, I write here about a theme or happening of the week that attracts my attention.  Sometimes, like this week, I wonder why I made my choice as I did.  Then it just hit me.  This is not about poor use of English used by Thais in a professional setting but rather about how they are treated by their own within their own society and culture.  Language is but a sign of what happens here. namely, the people are kept down by their superiors in their place and that is where they are to stay. 

I have read and I do see how Thais are all educated but only to a certain level so as to keep them in their station in society.  Have them too educated and too many might move above their level in society and thus create problems for the status quo.  An interesting theory but I see it in practice and it works.  My question as a good, western liberal is how long you can keep good people down?

Thai society is based on a strict and highly defined hierarchy.  Every one knows their place and is to keep their place.  "Don't rock the boat!" may be an unspoken national theme.  I see it in my workplace in the Church.  The staff are looked after by their boss or patron (however you want to identify it) but they in return are ruled by him. There is a price. I hear how staff are treated by their patron, in this case the bishop.  The model is one of "Follow me or else!"  It is not my model and it would not work at home.

As I try to deal with work matters with staff, this is the ultimate wall I hit time and again as I did again this week  Me being me can easily feed into this agenda as it is about righting a wrong and justice for the oppressed but you know what?  I have to act wisely and I have to remind myself yet again that this is not a just world in its everyday realities and I can't make it that way by being the lone warrior.  It just doesn't work.   

I recognize that this is not my fight and for good reason.  Bottom line is I have no right to change anyone and definitely no right to change a whole culture, even when I may judge it needs changing.  It just is not my place to engage in such a struggle.  After all, I am an outsider here and it is not my place to change anyone except myself.  What then is my place?

My place is to accompany, to speak honestly with ones in my life when they are treated abysmally and to encourage and empower them to act for themselves.  Ultimately, it is their struggle but not alone.  No one can fight their fight for them.  Nor is it anyone else's place to do so.  This is about respect and respecting each person's right and ability to raise themselves up but in a context where we act for and with each other. To put it another way, we see God in being with each other in our need, in getting our hands dirty with those in trouble.  We do not see God in controlling, directing or ruling others, even when they are down or in need and even when doing so for good purpose.

So I will keep reading these signs - Man and Men.  But where are the Women?

For Flock's Sake

"For flock's sake".  So is the 2010 Guardian article entitled that reports on the Vatican dictum that homilies should be kept to eight minutes.  I respect this ruling, or try to, in a country where many clergy exhibit the need to preach regularly for much longer.  As I try to understand why, I hear the line that it is so important to say everything on the matter at hand and not forget anything.  This is our obligation to the people.  Is it? What is this about?  Once again, control?  Or is it a sense of over importance concerning one's role and contribution in the world.

I am sure the faithful know what they need to do and know right from wrong.  It just is that their world is so tumultuous, so frightening at times.  Daily, they face dilemmas, crises big or small and questions demanding attention.  Life is not necessarily dealt with that easily by words given from on high.

There are the losses, the stresses, the anxieties, the doubts, the suffering that we all face in life.  They  arise in the throes of everyday life.  We do not wish or want them but they still come our way and we have to deal with them, whether we like it or not.  They just are part of the package that is life.

Life is not black and white.  It does not fit into easy and understandable categories.  It cannot be boxed in by our own designs and comforts.  All that life throws at us cannot be met with by planned responses or controlled strategies or even 20 minute homilies.  Rather the rough and tumble of life is faced by people's creativity, compassion, courage, initiative and just sheer will and determination.  People live their faith in the everyday unknown and not in the realm of an ecclesial fairy-tale.

I think of the good, simple Filipino woman who presented her third child for baptism last Sunday.  There she was with her husband and children and five of the eight godparents.  They were not hi-so with loads of cash and oozing fashion.  They were just good, down to earth, everyday people struggling to do the right thing and do it well.  When I joked about returning when they have Number 4, she just innocently looked at me, smiled and nodded gently a gentle No.  I love her.  My hat goes off to her.

The faithful are so wise in our world and so adept at dealing with their lot.  So much so that I am in awe of their wisdom.  For flock's sake, they do need the eight minute homily, but to affirm them of their goodness and to assure them that the humble God is with us in the struggle of the everyday.

Self-management not control.

The bride is relaxing ...

Last Saturday's bride was incredibly laid back.  All dressed up ready to go, there she was relaxing in the back row with her family, waiting for the wedding to begin.  Where is the groom at the same time?  Doing what he does best, organizing.  He is busy up front running the last minute practice for the wedding that is due to begin shortly.

Shouldn't the bride be nervously standing at the door to the church, waiting for her musical cue?  Shouldn't the groom know his place and be up the front, waiting for his bride?  Well, it is not happening that way here.  This scene before a wedding was most amusing and atypical for me and I was impressed.

The bride and the groom are both capable people, acting for their own good and as they so choose.  They are not simply fitting into stereotypical roles, even in 'wedding world' which is so highly controlled.  

...while the groom is organizing.  

Control?  Does it work?  People are never easily controlled, nor are they meant to be.  Those in authority may think they have the control but let us not fool ourselves.  There is no amount of control that can ultimately determine people.    

Who is running the show?   Well, maybe what is at play in life is good self-management and never control, or so I hope.

Focus on what matters.

Life gets so busy and for what purpose?  Really, for what purpose?  You worry about doing everything and you are ready to respond to the next task that may arise but is this what life is about?  Is it all so important when you have not seen a friend in an age or someone is waiting to talk with you from the side?  In a busy life, do I lose sight of what really matters?  Then what about good self care?  And, no, don't go down the road of Catholic guilt on that one!  

Doing, doing!  This is not the way to live life or to nourish oneself.

I then saw again this picture of two poor, young Burmese guys who are back in the news here.  They have been found guilty of rape and murder in a high profile case where the tragic victims were two young western tourists holidaying on a favoured Thai island.  These two guys now face the death sentence or many years in jail.  So doubly tragic when the whole case against them seems so fragile, unfair and unjust.  Basically, they just didn't do it but look at what they have to deal with as their appeal is before the courts this week.  Looking at their story gives a real sense of what really matters in life, and it has to be much more than doing, doing all the time.  We matter.  People matter.  That is what comes first.  As I say at church, being before doing.  

Stand back and take a look at life.  If it is being overcome by doing and all that goes with it - stress and loss of perspective in life - then it is time to do life differently.  Life is too precious to waste on just focusing on doing.  Life is too precious to see two innocent souls suffering for what they didn't do.  I pray for them and I thank them this day as they, in their distress, have reminded me of what really matters in life. 

I think too rationally

On Sunday, I arrived at the cathedral to see many symbols at play.  A clash of symbols or just too many?  This is a week when we celebrate our patronal feast - the Assumption of Mary.  I expected that but then I see the Thai Church celebrating at the same time 100 years since Our Lady of Fatima appeared to the three children in Portugal.  The apparition of Mary to these children happened on the 13th of each month from May to October in 1917.  The last apparition saw the major miracle of Fatima - the Miracle of the Sun.  I am not sure why here they chose August as the month to remember and not another month.  I say this as Mary did not appear on the 13th day in August that year.  She chose to be different that month.  Why not remember Fatima in October - month of the rosary and month of the last apparition?  Everything all at once here?  Why? 

That was my take but, on sharing this with a friend after mass, he automatically replied - In Thailand, it is this month because of the Queen's birthday and Mother's day both being on 12 August and Assumption being the patronal feast.  Of course, Thailand is remembering 100 years of Fatima in August due to local Thai factors and not due to history or universal factors. 

Obviously, I do not have a Thai mind as I think too rationally for here.  Like it or not, when you live in Thailand, Thailand has its own thought patterns with the focus being Thailand and all things Thai.

Then on Tuesday, the actual day of the feast of the Assumption, I am in Yangon for work.  I had travelled in the morning from Bangkok. I had arranged with a Burmese who works with me and also going for the same meeting, but on a different flight, for him to meet me at Yangon airport and we get a taxi together.  Easy!  Not so!  My plane had a problem and so I was two hours late arriving.  On talking with my Burmese colleague already in Yangon, I told him not to wait for me.  Well, guess what?  On arriving at Yangon, my Burmese colleague and his wife were there patiently waiting for me to see that I got to our office okay.  I was so touched by such a kind and gracious act.

On that day, I went to mass at Yangon cathedral.  The priest spoke too long and it was all theory and doctrine.

Well, what spoke to me that day of Mary, our model in faith, whose feast we celebrated today?  It wasn't the priest's homily.  Maybe I am not that rational after all.

Who said there is a shortage of priests?

Lo and behold, last Sunday, there were four priests seeking to formally join me in mass at the cathedral.  Three were Vietnamese in town with a group of 40 Vietnamese tourists who were a fun group, being wild on the photo taking front. The other priest was a diocesan priest from Italy who was a French speaking African.  He seemed to be doing his Thailand holiday thing.  So there were five of us together last Sunday.  I was a bit taken aback as were we overdoing the priestly thing at church?  

As I already had three Vietnamese priests joining me for mass, I was internally shocked when another priest, the African from Italy, appeared before me, asking that he join in as well.  It was all too much, all at once, and right before mass.  It was putting me into a theological spin.  Sound a bit dramatic?

For me, what was at play was a theological point of order which reflects on how one sees community at worship.  We are all one community gathered for worship, celebrating together.  No matter who we are, we are all co-celebrants with the one presider, while playing our different and necessary roles.  Each role is important.  So why do some priests feel the need to concelebrate at every mass they attend?  The danger is that, if we overplay one role, specifically the clerical role, what are we saying about the other roles?  Are we engaging in an exercise that is overly clericalizing the Church?

Priests have a specific role and ministry which is at the heart of church.  That said, clericalism, the over playing of the clerical role on the basis of power, is an abuse based on hierarchical position.  This abuse is to be fought and not encouraged.  My questioning is not about the good men who are priests but about an issue of power in the Church which is to be always used for the good of the community.  To use position to highlight one group of the church over the rest is not about Church but about power and its abuse.  This is to be guarded against and avoided.  Hence my caution last Sunday. 

Transformation - me?

The gospel calls us not simply to do good and be nice people.  It calls us to transformation.  And who is able for such a task?  Not necessarily those many  would first expect. 

This week, I read the story of a 55yo Filipino Monsignor who was arrested for procuring a 13yo girl for sex.  The story gets even worse when you read that the priest was using the services of a 16yo male pimp.  The police were actually after the pimp and got the priest as a surprising added bonus.  He was found with a gun which he tried to pull on the police.  Now I would be willing to doubt the veracity of this story but I read it on the official website of the Catholic Bishops' Conference of the Phillipines.  I was just shocked to read such a story.  I will not try to excuse or explain it.  It is just an evil act and definitely should never happen with a priest as the main player.  As the Filipino Archbishop talking on this matter rightly counselled, we are all capable of evil. 

Reading this, I am once again assured of my conclusion that the Church is ripe for reform and even for much more - transformation.  Reason is that the Church needs much more than just a makeover or new structures.  I would add that we are all ripe for such a radical life changing path.  This transformation is for me and not just for an institution, hitting us at the very core of who we are and affecting us all.  This is the transformation offered by the gospel, and it is just what we need right now.   

Transformation is poignantly described for me in a small book I just discovered through a good friend.  It is called "The Bells of Nagasaki".  It is the story of a Japanese doctor and university researcher in Nagasaki at the time of the dropping of the bomb.  He did survive the explosion but he suffered terribly and died a few years later of leukemia.  Despite all, he and his surviving colleagues immediately got up and went out to respond to the suffering of the people around them.  Everyone, including them, was in dire straits and shock but this small group of medical professionals purposefully chose to use their skills to help their fellow sufferers. 

As this doctor, a good man of strong Christian faith, describes - within days of the devastation of Nagasaki, he had gone from working to help Japanese suffering in the war to reaching out to a suffering humanity; he had gone from believing in peace through a victory for a Japan at war to believing in peace for the whole world.  Through this experience of horror, his basic life stance naturally turned round to believing that this man made devastation could never happen again.  Such an awful and barbaric tragedy was the catalyst for his transformation - seemingly complete and immediate. 

What will be our catalyst?  Transformation is for you and me. 

The wedding that was

Well, last Saturday's wedding did occur and it was very pleasant.  I did go to the reception and I was glad I went for I got the background story and warning for an upcoming baptism.  Yes, the bride and groom are expecting.

This was an absolute first for me.  No, not that they are having a baby but that they used their reception as the public platform to announce the news and that this was followed by their running a competition for their guests on guessing the sex of the baby.  There was even prize money for the first opened correct entry.  All this at one of the poshest hotels in the country.  Different!

My first reaction was one of internal disbelief and discomfort.  Shouldn't they have told me before the wedding?  I thought - Hold on!  Do not react.  Do not try to control the situation.  Just see where it goes. 

What I saw was how everyone present was so happy and supportive, even in a conservative Thailand where prestige and public presentation are everything.  I reflected how the Church needs to reform itself so as to be able to speak to people today in their reality, instead of always being seen as standing above and telling people what to do with sex and their private lives.  The Church is too much about upholding a morality that it uses to pronounce from on high.  I am not advocating that that the Church simply be relevant or abandon good and needed values and a challenging vision needed for life and the uplifting of humanity.  God forbid! 

Rather it is about being able to lead by being with people and not above them, by affirming them ore and condemning them less, realising that control never works.  They will ultimately do what they decide to do.  Despite a controlling Church and even controlling society, people make their choices.  Their chioices may not be in line with a Church stance nor with the rule of the elite in any society but that does not make their actions intrinsically evil.  People are just being people.  Let them relish their exploring more and let them enjoy the journey more.

The world is a mess but it is always thus.

I have another wedding this Saturday.  Once again, here in Thailand, the wedding is between a Catholic and a Buddhist.  He is Filipino, she is Thai.  Hence they have me, as they want the ceremony in English.  Once again, they want all the trimmings.  Personally and theologically, when it is a marriage between a Christian and a non-Christian, I am not sure why they always demand to celebrate their marriage within the eucharist. 

It seems illogical to me when at least half the people there, including one of the two getting getting married, have no idea at all of what is happening as they are not Catholic.  Secondly, in marriage, we celebrate unity but, with eucharist in the same celebration, we highlight disunity as one partner and one whole side of this new family cannot share eucharist as it is not their belief.  Then there is the added factor of language as the celebration is in English and many present will not understand English.  So why bother?  There are just so many mixed messages in the one celebration.  Basically, we are highlighting disunity while our focus is celebrating unity.  What is religion about?   

Another couple agreed with me that celebrating their marriage during mass was contradictory when one of them held no religion.  The Catholic partner had then told a Thai Catholic friend that the wedding ceremony would not include mass and the response of the good Catholic was one of shock as mass would act to make for a successful marriage.  Really, even when one partner has no religion?   Is religion reduced to superstition? 

Back to this Saturday's couple.  As usual, they are lovely people but I have to ask - where do they come from?   Why come to the cathedral to get married?  Why get married during mass?  

I did raise the issue of not celebrating the marriage within mass with this couple and I was asked a question by the Catholic groom. 
How long does it take with the mass? 
About 50 minutes, I responded.
The groom, who is the Catholic, replied - That is good timing for the reception.  So we will have mass.
So in this case, is it all reduced to timing? 

I wanted to share another story of this week.  Briefly, it concerns a well bred, older, educated American who comes here every six months.  He is full of how the world is spinning out of control, especially under a Trump presidency.  It is as if his life mission is world salvation.  For him, it is all about talking and philosophising so as to try and bring the world under his cloud of control.  If no control, it will not work.  I agree, the world is a mess but it always has been.  Reality is I cannot solve it and neither is it my place to do so alone. 

My point in both stories of this week is really about how religion has been lost in our world, when our world so needs it so as to provide an ethic for order and unity.   When religion is so needed, it is either not understood and so not used or abused to present what it is not about.  What then is religion about? 

A key is in the gospel for this week's wedding - building our house on a solid foundation.  One basic premise is that it is not my house alone.  We then build our house together with God.  The world is a mess.  That is for sure.  True religion aims to make sense out of the chaos and so give us a sure foundation in the midst of the chaos that is with us always.

They're dead. Let them be.

This coming week sees the fifth anniversary of my mum and dad's death.  They died in the same week.  

Each year around the anniversary of my parents, one part of my family will put photos of their grandparents on Facebook and each year I cringe.  My inner response is  - They're dead.  Let them be.  Why keep bringing them up for the whole world to see?  

Life is never perfect.  Imperfections reign in all our lives.  I had wondered what would happen to all the hard bits, the unresolved matters at hand that had built up in dysfunctional ways over the years in my relationship with mum and dad.  On their death, I found out.  There was a natural and sudden letting go.  It all just happened.  It was the miracle for me of their death.  Everything was resolved and I was left with grateful memories and fond thoughts of  two people who loved me deeply.

Any conflict I had with them over my 55 years was resolved.  Any bad memories were gone.  Any fear I had of what next in the control line with them no longer mattered.  My only natural, inner stance was to be ever thankful for mum and dad, appreciating that they were good and kind people who always did their best to do the right thing by me.  They loved me, loved me as much as they possibly could, and that was it.  They were now gone to God, remaining ever close in a new way.  It was that simple.  No need to explain anything.

So why keep bringing them back in a public forum through Facebook?  Just let them be.   I don't get it.  I even don't like it as I would think that mum, who was such a private person, would hate to see she was put up for public display on a Facebook page.  We do such things for ourselves.  There is no need to do anything for mum and dad now other than pray with and for them, and remember them with love, gratitude and fondness.   What more can we do?  No more.  

They lived a lifetime together.  They loved their family together. They died together.  They did what they could.  It is that simple.  Let them be with God.  That is how I see it.

Why is The Question

My social work training taught me never to ask the "Why" question when helping people.  Ask all the other questions - who, what, how, when, where.  Reason is that asking "Why?" is a closed question, seemingly leading nowhere else.

Then this week, I am at a communication training with Caritas where we are told to use the "Why?" question.  Reason is that it leads to the best communication of opening oneself up to others.

Well, this has made me ask myself the "Why?" question.
Why am I here?  Why am I who I am?  Why am I a Catholic with all the scandal and upset going on in the Church?

I am asked the "Why?" question with a sense of curiosity by someone who comes to me for a life confession.  He is searching and asks me - Why am I who I am?  It all makes me reflect and I think it is time to share some good news. It is time not to escape in any direction but to be positive about why I am who I am for the sake of nourishing life - mine and others.   

Basically I am who I am because of where I come from and the people who are so much a part of my story.  I was born in 1956 Australia and learnt from growing up within a loving and good family, within a life giving Catholic culture and within a safe and friendly community, with all sharing a concern for the other.  As I remember it, my growing up environment was based on the same underlying theme for life.  They all taught me that what really mattered in life was about standing up for the underdog, helping people up when they are down and always standing by your mate (male or female).  It is that simple and I am ever thankful for where I come from.
    

No skin, please.

I took this shot as I was so taken by the traditional dress of the young Thai girl for this wedding I had at the cathedral recently.  The style of dress just speaks of Thai class and dignity.  The bride and groom were a by-product for this photo, just naturally joining in for the pose. 

I find myself doing more weddings these days which is introducing me to ever more pastoral practices of the Thai Church.  What is being revealed to me  horrifies me as I am seeing more clearly the level of control the Thai Church applies in its pastoral practice.

Wedding couples as they approach their marriage in the Church face control over all sorts of issues.  One big issue is the bride's gown.  My goodness!  I believe that one should be respectful in their dress but the level of intervention is quite amazing.  It is treating adults as children.  Even the priest here is to counsel the bride to be about her dress.  (I don't as it is not my area.) 

I have a bride - not the one pictured here - who is told that her dress is too transparent and has to alter it.  The issue as explained to me is that you see the skin through the material.  I have to say that we are not talking revealing here, just that you can see skin.  I was gobsmacked.  How do the church authorities know about a bride's dress?  Well, brides are to submit a photo of their dress before the wedding for a judgement.  In weddings here, I actually would be more concerned about the level of cost but that is not the case. 

As for the bride concerned, she is a good and intelligent woman whom I enjoy meeting with her future husband.  She holds to no religion but shows a searching heart and inquiring mind.  I am an anti-control freak but I wish to go beyond the issue of control to the issue of how does Church make a positive impact on a person like this 'bride to be' if they just focus on controlling them according to the local Church's norms? 

The Church in Asia has chosen as a basic thrust that of inter-religious dialogue which from what I can see means high ranking clergy and religious meeting with high ranking Buddhist monks for chats and exchange of gifts.  It all involves a lot of talk with little trickle down effect, as I see it.  So the question is how do you touch the average citizen? 

Not in this way of engaging in high level dialogue and not by overcoming the average citizen with Church doctrine and control mechanisms whenever they come your way.  Nearly every wedding in the Church here is between a Catholic and a Buddhist and so here lies a real life opportunity for some 'hands on' inter-religious dialogue.  And what do we do?  Waste the opportunity by focusing on if one can see the skin of the bride.  How tragic!  Another missed opportunity for inter-religious dialogue where it counts - in people's lives. 

How to touch the heart?  How to tap into the spirit of the people?  Not through control. 

We may have Pope Francis but ...

Mahidol University

This was the title of a paper I presented this week at Mahidol University here in Bangkok.  The university's Institute of Human Rights and Peace Studies together with UN-ACT (the UN's body acting against human trafficking) had arranged a two day conference on migration.  My offer to present a paper at this conference was accepted by the organising committee and so I got to achieve another first in my life. 

The title may mystify you but simply my thesis was that the practice of the Church in helping such politically sensitive populations as migrants and refugees does fail to reach its own high goals as set by the vision of the gospel and I asked why.  As I said at the conclusion, we have Pope Francis placing the goals before us and leading the way, but that does not mean total acquiescence from within the Church with what he preaches.  Francis is probably smart enough to know that this is the case but he just keeps on showing the lead. 

This was a week of firsts for me.  Another was at mass on Sunday.  I had shared briefly during mass on sexual abuse in the Church so as to make the point that we as a community have the central task of sharing the story of faith and, in respecting that essential task, we must not have secrets in our midst. 

Well at the end of mass, a regular member of our faith community got up unannounced and spontaneously to say something to all present.  I know him well as I help him and his family who are Pakistanis seeking refuge here.  His mother is a real dear.  I wondered what was going to happen.

Well his message was to share that he had been abused as a child and he knew what it was like to be a victim.  He wanted to tell families present to be extra vigilant of their children if they showed worrying changes in behaviour.  Listen to your children and do not ignore them.  This was his message brought on by my earlier sharing.  At the end, he got a rousing round of applause from everyone.   I was both touched and affected by his brave initiative for the sake of the community. 

I have to say that it was a definite first in my 30 years as a priest.  This was part of the impact on me that I had never experienced such an act in such a context.  I was not only affected by his bravery but the nature of his message and its impact on others and not just on me.  As I stood back, I was struck by how this showed his level of acceptance in this local church.   He and his family know so many struggles in a big and sometimes hostile Bangkok but still I could see that here he had found a place where he belonged.

This is what Pope Francis is all about.  We all have a place in the world and belong together.  He is merely mirroring the gospel message.  His leadership is having an impact.  Most importantly, this impact is seen in the yous and mes of the Church, the very place where leadership rightfully belongs, leadership from within the grassroots.   

Change is as good as a holiday

Nothing like a change of scenery to clear the air and that is what I got his week.  No, I was not off to the beach.  You can see that from my photo, I was in a hotel right in the middle of my Bangkok.  The surrounding skyline for my week could make you think you are in the middle of some big American city.  Such are the big cities of Asia!

What I got was a sideways move for the week to attend a conference but still refreshing.  So what was refreshing?

I have to admit that I enjoy the change of scenery and the change of pace and routine.  These conferences are held in hotels which have the facilities and space needed for such an event, and along with the hotel comes the lunch which is an ever welcome bonus.  Yet the experience is about much more.  

The occasion this week has been the Caritas Asia conference.  This brings together people from all over Asia.  Yes, they come from the exotic places like China, Mongolia, Uzbekistan and Kyrgyzstan, places where I have never been and just picture in my mind.  I wonder what the Church is like there; I wonder what life is like there.  Then I meet and hear the priest from China.

His view on the Church and China is that it is okay and what is needed is for the west to change its mindset on China.  He points out that the west is focused on China opening up but he says it is already open to the world and has been so for 30 years.  The western Church, he holds, has the wrong focus of working for sending in foreign priests.  He notes this is impossible under the law in China and that it is the people as well as the government who view the Church as foreign.  His appeal instead was that the Church send in good and capable people of the Church to work with the Chinese Church on social development, helping Chinese Catholics who will receive through such partnerships good witness, a healthy and wider vision of  world and Church, and a good overall education in being Church.  His focus is what the people in the Chinese Church need so as to be better Church and it is not a simple clerical focus.  Take a fresh approach is his message.

So such a week shows me new horizons through meeting and listening to new others in my life, coming from such different environments and settings from my own.  Such new people in my week gift me with an added stimulus for life.  They refresh me.  Yes, a change is as good as a holiday, and it is not just about going to a Phuket or a Koh Samui.  It can be right in the middle of my Bangkok.

We are so important?

Sometimes in life, we need to just get off the roller-coaster, take a good look at ourselves and focus on what really matters.  Presently, I feel overcome by work and am overly focused on being perfect in what I do.  The latter is my experience when I am too work focused in life.  These are signs telling me that now is a time for me to get off the roller-coaster.

When I ask someone for his help in a work task and hear myself exaggerating points again and again in overly excited tones, I think to myself that something is wrong here.  When a friend offers some helpful advice on how he cannot hear me properly at mass and I react with blaming the microphone and protesting how much effort I put into each Sunday, I think to myself that something is wrong here.

Yes, work is important but is it that important?  I always highlight for others two things in life:
-Being is more important than doing.
-Control never works.
I know this to be true but I should take my own advice which gets lost when I am overcome by the tasks before me in daily life.

In focusing so much of life on work, on what we do and how we perform, we lose the point of life.  Why is that?  Because we come to take ourselves too seriously.  We see ourselves as mattering too much and when things go wrong or we do not perform up to standard, we are lost and react, or that is me.  Something is lost in the path of performing in life.  Yes, that is the word - performing.  In overly focusing on doing in life, how we perform becomes our main concern.  Then we have lost it and need to act to regain the focus on what really matters in life - our being.  And you know what?  We have control over nothing.  We are not perfect.  We just do our best and try to mange life for good.

Doing and being are intrinsically connected but when doing takes over, what matters is how we perform and no longer what we are doing in life to give expression to our being so as to make our mark in the world.   We just lose perspective. 

I am reminded of this when I see a young child without arms feeding himself.  What a champion!  Why is it then such a world issue for me if ones cannot hear me properly at church?  Their comments tell me something.  Act on them.  Don't despair and react.  We are not so important.  We are not alone on this planet.  The truth is that what really matters is not what we do but who we are and how we love one another.  In that way, we live the best of who we are and enjoy the most of a good life.

So don't just keep moving forward but more often stand back and enjoy the ride.

A global village?

 

 

 

No introduction needed for the people featured in the photo for my last entry.  Remember it?  It marked the occasion of President Trump's recent meeting with Pope Francis.  I shared this photo not to make fun of anyone but to make a serious point about our world in the west as I am experiencing it. 

I posted this photo on my Facebook page and it made quite a splash.  Yes, I was being funny and, yes, I could see a political point being made by this shot.  I am not naive.  However, I got a response I would never have expected, a response that upset me. 

Firstly, I discovered that in Facebook your posts can be seen by all sorts of people, people I do not even know.  Secondly, I saw my friends who do not know each other connecting with each other but in ways I would prefer not to encourage.  So what happened? 

I had one I do not know coming in and expressing with great vitirol how the media is biased and how Trump is achieving.  Another came in with equal vitirol opposing this person.  I had one friend being insulted by another friend of mine (neither know each other) just becasue she signalled a dislike for Trump.  My little Facebook world was becoming a battleground.

A friend being insulted through my posting really did upset me as the two are strangers and what was originally expressed was quite innocent.  My friend who expressed an anti-Trump stance  did not deserve the response she got from the other friend as it was just insulting.  Why attack a stranger just because they express an opinion? What purpose do aggression and rudeness serve?  What is to be achieved?    

So this week, I am seeing in my small corner how divided and aggressive the west is becoming or has become, and I do not like it.  This is the new norm I am hearing about.  I have to say that it worries me as it is leading to a more divided world.  It is an emerging reality in the west but what good will come out of it?  People disagree and can do so robustly but there is no need to get aggressive and insulting.  That is so counterproductive.   

I have struck this behaviour before.  It was when I was a parish priest.  Some people in the parish did not like what I was doing.  I was only doing my job and doing it as I judged best to do it but the opposing, conservative side in the parish came in with aggressive, personal attacks.  There was no need for that and was totally unproductive, only creating more division and upset. 

We live in a global village?  What good is it serving if we abuse the opportunities it offers us for good?  This I must ask after my Facebook experience of this past week.  People are able to communicate with others all over the world and what do we do? We can use it for good or we can be destructive and hurl abuse at others who do not agree with us.  Abuse happens where people come into a social medium to make political mileage by simply hitting others they disagree with over the head.  They may not even know each other and probably never will.  In a world that allows for greater connectedness, more people seem to use today's tools for communication to be more disconnected.  These people do not want to engage anyone in dialogue but just make their point in anti-social ways in an anonymous environment where no one has to take responsibility for what they say.  This is upsetting and achieves nothing but more harm in a world that needs more coming together.  How sad and how unnecessary and what a waste of an opportunity! 

Life can be Shocking

My Google dictionary defines "shocking" as that "causing offence or disgust".  When we think of shocking events, we think of the images and events of life that display incredible levels of suffering, carnage and damage.   We may see more and more of these happenings in today's world but we still expect them to be the unusual rather than the usual, to generally stay behind the scenes.   

Then in the week that is, this photo comes my way and I see the Pope giving a classic look.  It is just something to behold!  It tells me we can experience the shocking at the most unexpected of times and in the most unexpected of places.  It is not just in the great disaster stories that we experience the shocking in life but in our everyday life, in the little events of our life.  It is not always the big slap in the face.  We just don't know it.

A comment is made in our presence and it shocks us.  A look comes our way or we see the unexpected and it shocks us.  An unexpected story unfolds about someone we know and it is just unbelievable.  It can even be funny but it is still shocking.  Life does take its toll and we may not be even aware of what is going on around us.  Then the great tragedy, disaster or calamity happens and we are put in touch with that other side of life that is going on continually but we just do not feel comfortable confronting but at times we just cannot avoid it. 

I am at a conference on children caught up in the migration movements in our world.  I am hearing of what is part of our world's reality - child brides, child labour, child prostitution, child trafficking.  Unbelievable but it cannot be denied.  Yes, this is tragic and shocking but it still happens and goes on and on.  So what are we going to do about it?  Yes, this is not the whole picture and it is not the lot of the world's vast majoruity of children but it is still happening too often and to too many.  We are so unaware while the shocking is happening in our midst and we only gain a glimpse of it when the shocking hits the news or the shocking becomes too much or crosses that red line such that we can no longer ignore it. 

Rule of thumb is "once is too often".   So let us keep our eye open for the shocking. 

Worth Remembering, Worth Celebrating - Life is WOW.

I always place my photos using medium size but this photo deserves to be big.  This is not because of me but because of who is with me and what this represents.  You see this photo was taken 30 years ago on the occasion of my ordination which I am remembering this Sunday.  It was an event, a celebration, a commitment in my life that belonged very much to my parents who are here pictured with me at the time.

They are now dead and perfectly okay with God.  I am thankful to God for that.  More importantly, I am ever thankful for them as they were good and kind people who loved me and simply did the best they could by me.  They could do no more.  So why be anything else but thankful?  It is the very least they deserve to be remembered with kindness and thanks.  .

30 years!  Amazing!  One third of that time has been spent here in Bangkok.  Absolutely amazing that I have spent so long in one place as that is not my style but that is how life turned out.  I didn't plan it this way.  I couldn't have planned it.  I just found my little corner along my way in the strangest of places - Bangkok.

My journey so far could not have been planned by me as it would have been impossible for me to do so and handle it all in any style.  After so much questioning and challenging, to finally find such fulfilment in a Bangkok, which is such a crazy place, tells me that God surely is an integral partner in the journey.  How else could all that has happened in my life be?

And I have shared this journey with such great people, absolute classics - good and kind people like my mum and dad.  I am very gifted by God and I am most thankful.  What more can I say or do I need to say?  Keep the journey going.  As I shared last Sunday at Mass, life is a WOW event.  We just might not appreciate how WOW it truly is.