jaam-nong

If my Thai is any good, 'jaam-nong' is the anglicised version for the Thai word meaning 'to aim'. This would be my new word for the day and the word that would keep me determined to face my chosen challenge for the day. What was my challenge? To go to the big prison in Bangkok to visit Ms N., a South African woman. Why was such a task so daunting for me? Because I was to go alone for the first time and not wait for some Thai companion to come with me. In doing so, I knew I would have to stand on my own two Thai feet in dangerous and unknown territory for what if I did not know a word or could not say it properly? Whatever, I was not going to be stopped from doing what I needed to do.

My first great hurdle came when I got on the bus and told the conductor where I was going in Thai. She just looked at me as I was stupid. I knew it was not her but me. She told me I was on the wrong bus but I kept at it with the help of the Thai woman in front of me and my map, and eventually I got the ticket I needed. When I got to the Ngam Wong Wan Road intersection, I got off the bus. I then had to check my direction before heading off and finally I got to known territory as I have been to the prison many times but always with a driver.

The next hurdle was filling out the prison form for making a visit. It was all in Thai. I can read Thai but so slowly and not easy. So I had a crack at it and did my best. Guess what? The prison Officer accepted the form as I gave it but I think it was because all there know the woman I was visiting as she has been there over 15 years and from South Africa. So how many would fit that bill?

So far, so good, but then they took my passport. My question then is - when do I get it back and from where? I have to have faith here as the officers all know what they are doing and, I must say, they seem so helpful and friendly.

So, yes, with some help from another westerner who was waiting also to see someone, I did get to see N. On elast hurdle was that I may have missed my call. So I did have to go and check with one of the officers if N.'s name was called out in the last round of announcements for calling visitors. The friendly officer told me to go and see her now! So success!!! (but with some help from friendly others)

I got to visit N. and complete my mission for the day. Yeah!! Did it!!! Good on me!!

This is my second time ever to visit N. The connection is my American friends who are trying to help her. They are both away and so I go in their place. I know that she has been inside a long time. She has done over 15 years of a 26 year sentence. She is there for a drug trafficking offence and the sentence was death commuted to life. Her story is a typical one for women here on this offence. Her boyfriend asked her to carry a bag for him and she did and she got caught. I realise how few people help her and how little her government is doing, if anything for her. So she lingers on in a Thai prison. How sad! Yes, she was involved in something wrong but to get such a punishment and be left so alone for so long??

As I left I felt so sad. Why? It was not her story but seeing her hand. As she walked away, N. had raised her hand up above the barrier that is between prisoners and visitors. The barrier is not only distance but also the wire and the glass in between. It makes it hard to both hear and see each other during the visit. She was waving 'Goodbye' and I waved back. It hit me that this is the closest physical connnection we have ever had over the two visits. It was just such a powerful symbol for me of connecting with another human being within difficult circumstances that I just felt overwhelmed. There are no photos for this story but just a powerful symbol - two hands waving 'Goodbye'.