Arrogance

Today, I was on bus 504 to Sutthisarn where I go for the Bangkok Refugee Centre. Buses here have bus conductors who take the fares. So I tell the conductor "Sutthisarn". She did not say one word but signalled that she did not understand. So I said "Sutthisarn" again and she just gave me such an arrogant look. That is another side of the gentle, loving Thai. There is an arrogant side to them that can be seen sometimes. Today I experienced from this conductor one of the most arrogant looks I have ever experienced.

What is it about Thais that makes arrogance part of their mix? One theory is that it is their pride that their country was never colonised. Maybe that is the reason. Still they did pay a price for not being colonised and that is also part of their history but generally unrecognised by Thais. That enters into another part of Thai reality - their ignorance regarding their history or how their history is coloured in its presentation to them.

Maybe there is another way to approach this. Maybe it is not arrogance but part of the meeting between such different cultures that leads to a misunderstanding or a failure to really meet.

Having said this, I hold that the culture card is played too often and too strongly here. Everything and anything can be explained away here by simply saying - 'that is Thai culture' or 'we are Thai people'.

The most recent example of this just flabbergasted me. A is an American I know here who was married to a Thai woman for 15 years. They have a son. Two years ago, she just left them. It was a shock as it just happened without any explanation. A came into my radar again recently as he is quite sick.

I was talking with B, another American friend, about A's situation. B told me that I had to understand why A's wife would have left him and their son. She would have found another western male who could provide even more prosperously for her family in Isan. This is her duty within her family. As B said, that is their culture and we have to accept that.

Yes, B, that is their culture but just because it is their or anyone's culture it does not make it right or good. In this case, it is not a good part of their culture. You don't just fulfill your duty to find ways of financial support for your family at any cost and the expense of anyone or everyone who matter in your life. Any culture has good and bad aspects. Any culture deserves to be more informed and to be open for change for the better. It may not be easy to face a challenge to who we are but we don't just explain bad things away by saying that it is their culture. What is called for is a challenge to the culture where it is weak or acts against the good of others and against good, human values. Here is where other cultures can act to enrich the local culture. Here is a case where we just do not accept but see that we as Christians in the midst of Thai culture have something to add and we act to do that in the right and appropriate way. A great challenge in faith.

How did I get onto this? Through a simple arrogant look from a bus conductor at the beginning of my day in Bangkok.