Of late, I have noticed myself over reacting in negative ways to people and events far too often. I could say that as I age, I happily get more direct in dealing with unwanted baggage. Well, to be honest, it has been more than that as I have been picking on certain individuals far too often, far too readily.
The pattern is that these poor souls feature in my history of life hurts. They then come my way quite innocently and I readily pounce upon an opportunity to vent. The trouble is that I saw these hurts as being in the past but obviously not so. Otherwise, why do they affect me as they do? Hence, I am given a rude awakening that tells me I need to own my issues so that I can act upon them. I then best acknowledge that this is not about them, but about me for I have obviously and unwittingly allowed them far too much space in my universe for far too long, and I cen see the impact upon me.
I keep saying to everyone that the best advice ever given me on coming to Bangkok was to "create your own universe and only allow those you choose into it". Now I see its implications for good and healthy living.
This motif for life in my Bangkok is not about not engaging the other, nor keeping the other at a distance, nor is it about having to be friends with everyone. It is about something much more and deeper, an ingredient for healthy life and good care.
It is about not invading other people's personal space, even if for good reason. It is about not letting others invade my personal space for good reason, so that I can best look after the other and myself. Maybe it could be described as 'let the issues of others be their issues and my issues be mine'. At the core of this way for living in the messiness and chaos of life is a key principle of life - show respect to the other and self at all times.
And you know what? Respect has been one of the three constant themes I have identified as being offered to us through our shared experience of the pandemic. Amazing! It takes a pandemic and much more for me to learn a lesson in life. I can be a hard nut but I am gatting it back. We just need time to stand back, give everyone some space and reflect on the wider picture.
Be happy at getting it back.
Your formula has worked well for me for about 30 years. Before that every issue was considered mine whether I chose to accept it or not. I felt liberated once I learned that I could choose my universe because I was chosen as a person who believes.
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